Have You Considered a Collaborative Divorce?
If you are interested in getting through your divorce in as civilized a manner as possible, think about pursuing a collaborative divorce, a team process with the goal of minimizing the kinds of conflicts that often crop up during standard, litigation-based divorces. During a collaborative divorce-which is a litigation-free process-couples determine for themselves how to settle their cases instead of relying on divorce court judges to decide the terms of their children's custody, the appropriate levels of child support and alimony, or the division of their property.
How Will a Collaborative Divorce Team Work for You?
The collaborative divorce process relies on a group of professionals who guide the divorcing couple to a satisfactory agreement. This group will often comprise separate attorneys and mental health professionals or "coaches" for the husband and the wife, a single impartial financial advisor and a neutral child advocate if there are children involved. Each of these professionals uses his or her expertise to guide the couple toward a satisfactory marital settlement agreement. After this negotiation and settlement process is complete, the parties submit it for the court's approval.
Participation in a collaborative divorce requires that both parties adhere to certain terms. Participation agreements mandate that couples will not take their divorce cases to court and will agree to act in good faith and keep the best interests of their children a priority. Couples must also agree to disclose all pertinent information, refrain from taking advantage of mistakes on the other party's part, and hold all discussions during settlement meetings in strictest confidence.
These participation agreements work like contracts, and all parties-from the divorcing couples to the attorneys and the financial advisors-must sign them in order to take part in the process. Lawyers, for instance, are required to sign a pledge agreeing to avoid litigation and promising to remove themselves if that process breaks down and requires litigation. When this happens, each party must retain a new attorney.
Why Should You Consider Collaborative Divorce?
Collaborative divorces have many advantages over the standard divorce litigation process. First, it allows divorcing couples to retain control of the process, rather than turning it over to judges and attorneys who may or may not have their best interests in mind. Second, working with the guidance provided by a team of professionals helps divorcing couples to come to terms acceptable to both parties. Allowing divorcees to be active participants in the collaborative process increases the chances, many believe, that both parties will continue to abide by the marital settlement agreement.
Another advantage of collaborative divorces is that they are often faster and less expensive than litigation-based divorces. With this standard procedure, couples too often are caught in prolonged "he-said, she-said" battles about a any number of issues. The collaborative divorce process frequently goes much more smoothly, especially if couples are willing to trust each other and to put the needs of their children before their own needs.
When is Collaborative Divorce Not Recommended?
When dissolving marriages that involved physical or emotional abuse, collaborative divorce is often not the best option. A successful collaborative divorce process depends heavily upon the participation agreement, which ensures that no one will go to court, fail to act in good faith, or lose sight of the children's best interests. In marriages with histories of abuse and/or disregard for one spouse in the relationship, collaborative divorce is not likely to be the wisest-or even the most realistic-choice.
Would You Like to Know More about Collaborative Divorce?
To learn about this "kinder, gentler" divorce process, contact a divorce lawyer in your area right away. Wherever you are in the process-whether you've only just begun considering divorce or have already been served with divorce papers-if the traditional litigation process is not for you, ask a divorce lawyer about collaborative divorce and find out how best to move toward the settlement you want.